I spent my weekend in my room watching old footage on my hard drive. Younger me didn't know much about filing systems so it's messy in there. I've got photos from holidays, creative files, design work and personal footage scattered across the floor of my digital vault.

It's been quite the process, but amidst the spring cleaning, there's a quiet satisfaction in knowing that I've lived all of it. Especially in fitness.

It's a surprise to me because I never thought of myself as an active guy. For the record, I started working out seriously in 2017 and it took me 2 years to make progress.

But that's not the point, I'm not here to talk about new chapters or sweet beginnings. I'm here to talk about the post-honeymoon phase. The part most people don't talk about, because it's usually an endless grey road called consistency. It's where fitness ambitions come to die.

Why? Because most people are interested in the get-fit-quick tutorials that summon abs in 6 minutes through their online courses. As that's happening, we've got enhanced athletes selling the illusion of a perfect physique while faking their natural claims. Simultaneously, we've got Big Fitness colour-coding us with their bland and uncreative activewear. Am I crazy? Surely, I'm not the only one annoyed by this.

That was the allure. And we've fallen for it – myself included. The point was to get our foot in the door and they succeeded.

The beginning was easy, wasn't it?

It often is. A gym membership here, a protein shake there, new sports shoes, a compression tee and yet, 2 years later, you feel stuck.

Welcome to the game of fitness, where you're left to your own devices once you've paid the admission fee. And as time keeps ticking, you wonder if it's even worth it to keep going. Self-doubt creeps in here.

"How long more before I feel the change?"
"Should I have gotten a personal trainer too?"
"Maybe I'm just not built for this"

I know that feeling all too well and I feel compelled to share my journey on it because I decided to keep going, and it paid off. Let's start with question 1.

1. Set checkpoints, not a final destination

If you've been consistent, chances are that you see changes but you don't feel it. The reason I've found is because the results are not convincing enough for your mind or subconscious yet.

And it's the same reason why you shouldn't rush the process because what no one will tell you in the fitness industry is that this is an infinite game. It's a blessing and a curse. Once you start, you can't stop. Once you stop, you lose progress.

"Well, progress towards what?" you might ask. And that could vary from person to person. It could be a weight class, a strength level, a level of flexibility. You name it, but as long as you're alive, there is no finish line. I learned this when I achieved what I thought was my dream physique.

But once you reach it, you'll realise that you were more capable than expected. So, you set a new goal, you reach it, and the cycle continues. What I'm getting at is that your physique isn't a once-and-done side project. It's an ever-evolving work in progress that adapts to your everyday life.

Unlike video games go, there is no golden barbell boss fight with Arnold Schwarzenegger where you "win the game". But the good news is that you can set the winning criterion, and don't let society set the standard. You don't need to bench a certain weight by a certain age nor do you need to join competitions.

But you do need to keep your own promises, and you need to do it for you. If you want to be a beacon for the people around you, you best believe this is a habit you have to honour on your best and worst days and you can't do that without consistency or discipline.

2. You are your best personal trainer

Personal trainers are pay to win – completely optional and that's fine. I think they can be really helpful when you start lifting or when you're preparing to compete. I say this because I was lucky enough to get one as part of my package at 20, but as time went by, I found that the most reliable trainer you can invest in is yourself.

Why? Because while you can pay someone to make sure you get through a brutal workout, would you pay them to make sure you get enough sleep and hydration? How about every time you decide to erase your hard work over some snacks? The bottom line is that you can't expect someone else to watch over you 24/7.

I deeply believe that no one can or should understand your body better than yourself. Your trainer telling you to perform a certain exercise even though you know it hurts isn't something they'll be able to know. You have to explore different workouts to feel what works best for you and you can only do that by matching your actions to your promises.

If you say you'll be going to the gym to hit legs tomorrow, keep your word. The same way no one else will feel your gains, no one else will get your pain. Learn to trust yourself and communicate with your body through the blood and sweat.

3. You're right, you weren't built for this

So what? Neither was I.

You could draw me as a stickman before I started lifting and it would've been 90% accurate. I was so weak I couldn't even lift the barbell. But that's no reason to stop. In fact, that's exactly why we keep going. If you aren't built for it, you build for it.

You are more than who you think you are, but you need time to cultivate that person and 2 years ain't gonna cut it. But guess what? That voice in your head doesn't truly go away either. You learn to live with it, because when it does question your self-worth, you'll have the physical evidence and mental proof that it will feel dumb for asking in the first place. Bonus points if you document yourself on the path. You don't have to share it, but you should definitely keep it as a souvenir. Trust me, it'll be worthwhile.

[me, squatting in 2020]

Funny how time works. One night I'm looking through old training footage, the next I'm writing to inspire those in the trenches. 9 years doesn't sound like a long time until you realise it's a third of your lifespan and I'm thinking it's time I share more about my experiences.